DATELINE: STANDING BY THE FONT, WANTING TO PUKE IN IT: It has come to the attention of the media today that the parents of Simon Weisenthal, the now well-known Nazi hunter who passed away in 2005 , has been posthumously baptized into the Mormon faith. While Mr. Weisenthal is not here to defend himself, his faith and the respect of his parents, others have stepped up to the plate, demanding that the LDS church stop the practice of posthumous baptisms… for Jewish Holocaust victims. What the hell is that? No, it should be stopped for all of them! I am sorry, but I am not now, and I will never be a Mormon, and I would be right pissed off if some asshole had the unmitigated audacity to ‘save my soul’ by baptizing me into a faith I did not believe in. Yes, the LDS church claims to have the fastest growing church… it’s just that they are getting dead new members, the ones who can’t cause any problems, or argue about it. It is the most egregious activity I have ever heard from, something that should not be happening, but it does, and it has for years, and GOP front runner Mitt Romney has already acknowledged that he has participated in these activities – ergo he thinks it is just fine to ‘force’ a change of faith for anyone who is not in a position to argue about it. My parents were staunchly Catholic; for them to be baptized into another faith after they are gone would be catastrophic. Where the fuck do these people get off thinking it is their ‘right’ to ‘save’ our souls. The LDS claims these baptisms are their genealogical database, that it only takes relatives of its members, but that does not make it right by any means, especially seeing how far down their bloodlines they are prepared to go in search of a soul to save. If someone wanted to be fucking Mormon, they would have joined that church. If they didn't join the church, then leave them the hell alone! No, they should not be allowed to do it. It should be fucking illegal.
DATELINE: PULLING THAT BARGE AND TOTING THAT WHALE – In what has to be the most offensive mockery of the judicial system and of the suffering of truly enslaved people, PETA once again crossed the line in their fanatical attempts to prove a point. They filed a legal challenge that the whales held at SeaWorld were ‘slaves’, not getting paid to work, their constitutional rights being trampled. First, this is a huge insult to the people who actually do work to promote conservation, because this bullshit sets all of their genuine work into the same category of idiots and assholes that seem to be making decisions at PETA. It is, though, the ultimate slap in the face to those who did live as slaves, generations of them, and their offspring who are still trying to lift that yoke from their shoulders. Don’t even get me going about the waste of fucking tax dollars involved for a court to hear this crap, and the wasted money from legitimate donors wanting to help conservation. This was nothing more than a fucking costly and very ill-advised attempt at self-promotion and it is despicable. Whoever came up with it should have their ass shit-canned from PETA right now. Anything less would be totally unacceptable.
DATELINE: LOOKING FOR A CELEB TO DIE SO THEY CAN RACK UP THE RATINGS – I sent my very sincere apologies to the family and friends of Whitney Houston. Her death was a tragedy, without doubt. That said, the performance of the media in the last week has been, to say the least, disgusting. What the hell is the matter with you freaking death-mongering news anchors? Yes, her passing was news on Saturday. Yes, there was definitely a reason to mention the tribute to her at the Grammy’s because her death was so fresh in the minds of everyone, but come on… five days of coverage of her death?? What the hell is that? There is nothing new to say about it, so give her family and her friends some time to grieve in private. Had I passed in a bathtub, I am not so sure I would want the whole world to be talking about it every minute of the day. If my mother died that way, I would not want it to be fodder for news media for DAYS. This is no longer reporting news. How many times do you have to stick a microphone into someone’s face and ask ‘how do you feel now that she is dead?’ What the fuck are you expecting them to say? This is disrespectful… completely and totally disrespectful and classless. It is disrespectful to Ms Houston, to her family, to her friends, to her colleagues, to others who may have passed, to the family of service men and women who have passed, to the homeless person who did not have the good fortune to be discovered to have an astounding voice. Let it go. Show some fucking class.
DATELINE: DEMANDING SMALLER GOVERNMENT BY CREATING MORE GOVERNMENTAL BULLSHIT RED TAPE – Women wanting to have an abortion, for whatever reason, have to submit to a vaginal ultrasound probe if they live in Virginia. In the midst of all the bullshit about Republican demands about the sanctity of marriage (while the concept seems to mean nothing to them personally), while they thump their bible and decry the rights of other religions, while they try to legislate contraception where women are concerned (I don’t see any of them demanding the end of the sale of Viagra though. Hmmm, if sex is to be done only for the religiously-determined procreative purpose, what the hell do men need Viagra for? Or does the penis earn an exemption again in the population control issue? Penis perhaps are not required to be procreational?) So, while I do not agree with partial-birth abortions or with late-term abortions, to create a law that subjects a woman to an invasive medical procedure for NO reason is un-fucking-believable! What about the woman who, because of cultural reasons, is forced by her husband to have an abortion because the baby is the wrong sex? Now she has even more to deal with? An unnecessary chance for a doctor to stick something more up her crotch just for the sake of making her life more difficult? What the hell is wrong with you people? I guess it’s official, based on this new Virginia legislation and the GOP primaries, that the US is now completely determined to strip absolutely anyone of their rights unless they strictly adhere to the tenets of some convenient religious dogma. Way to go. How fucking sad.
So many things to say..where to begin?
ReplyDeleteDid you know Whitney Houston died? Yes, she is still dead as far as I know, at least according to the media. Her death while tragic is beginning to get annoying. Why? because daily people die. People around the world suffer and die silently without so much as a word about it. People who put their lives on the line for us, daily, die. Where is their media coverage? Where is the outpouring of memorials and tributes to these people?
Next up: Vagina, West Vagina. I think they should officially change the name of these fine places accordingly.