DAILY NEWS – FEBRUARY 11th, 2011

DAILY NEWS – FEBRUARY 11th, 2011


DATELINE: LEAVING ON A JET PLANE – Imagine opening up your bank statement and finding out that your kid just bought you a present, on your account… to the tune of $113,000. Thanks to the wonders of the internet and eBay, a seven-year-old boy in London did just that. He probably didn’t stop to consider just where Dad might park his Harrier fighter jet, space being a premium at many of those flats, but it looked just so damned cool. It’s a pretty safe bet that none of his friends’ dads had one. Fortunately the company who sold the jet to the boy were compassionate, and probably laughing their asses off as they cancelled the sale. I can guarantee you, if I found out my kid bought me a Harrier Jet, he would be on the next damn plane to boot camp in order to learn how to fly the sucker, and I would be advertising for a very nice, smoking hawt man in (and out of) uniform to play chauffeur.

DATELINE: TAKING A KNIFE TO A COCK FIGHT – ‘Don’t arm your cock!’ It was a lesson that Jose Luis Ochoa learned the hard way, when his prize fighting rooster entered the ring, fully cocked and loaded. Ochoa, apparently a real fucking rocket scientist, failed to learn. This asshole was stabbed in the leg by his own bird and died two hours later. I have no idea why he died, if he bled out or got some rampaging fucking infection in his leg, but it sure is interesting to speculate on. This piece of shit had been convicted before of illegal animal fighting, but apparently didn’t learn his lesson. No fucking doubt – a first offence in California is a misdemeanor; there’s an incentive for you. He had attached a knife to his cock’s leg for the fights. When the police arrived to bust the assholes, Ochoa and some spectators ran…. Well, Ochoa probably hobbled, but he still managed to run like a fucking chicken. Deputies found five dead roosters, but no arrests were made. I know we are talking about a person (I refuse to call him a human) and he is now dead, and that should result in sympathy. You want sympathy, then get out your fucking dictionary and look somewhere between shit and syphilis, cause you won’t find any in this report. These assholes take animals, wind em up, then toss them into a ring to kill each other, and yes, they fight to the death, or to the point of total incapacitation. They do this for entertainment and for betting purposes. These people are total fucking wastes of plasma. Dead is a good place for them.

DATELINE: SHAKING MY FUCKING HEAD – Lindsay Lohan, actor/ singer/ felon/ drunk/ spoiled brat/ criminal attended court this week, answering to charges of theft of a necklace. She has more money than fucking brains… hell, the knife-wielding fucking fighting chicken has more brains than Lindsay Lohan, but I digress… so why the hell does she have to steal anything other than to get more attention, because why stop at just being a tramp, when media whore is so much more fun. She argues that she was allowed to borrow the necklace and it was a misunderstanding. Again, I go back to the fact that she has more than enough money to buy one, so why the fuck would she ‘borrow’ a $2500 necklace? Regardless, she is BACK in court, she is on probation, she is charged also with breaking her probation – she is a fucking criminal. So how does the public react to this overindulged piece of shit? They run out and buy replicas of the dress she wore to court. What the fuck is the matter with you people? Do you have a collective fucking IQ somewhere below that of a fungus gnat? Perhaps we should don some Charles Manson caaa-razy hairpieces, or bow down before boxes of Ted Bundy Bundt Cake? How fucking sick can you all get? She is a CRIMINAL; perhaps we need to start treating her like one.

DATELINE: AWAITING JUSTICE, LONG OVERDUE – Tammy Marquardt is free today, after 14 years of incarceration. Her name is added to the unbelievably, unacceptably long list of people convicted on the evidence of pathologist Charles Smith. On the evidence of Smith, Marquardt was found guilty of killing her two-year-old epileptic son. As a result of this decision, she lost custody of her two other children. All of the cases that Smith worked on involved very young children. An inquiry revealed that in twenty instances, the doctor’s work was ‘flawed’. Thirteen of those cases, where he presented very damning and apparently unsubstantiated evidence, resulted in criminal convictions and incarceration. In a show of insulting fucking generosity, each of these wrongly convicted individuals will get paid a maximum of $250,000. Well, whoop-de-fucking-doo! It should be noted that this bastard did his work between the years of 1991 and 2001, so at the very least his victims served a minimum of 10 years before being exonerated. So, you might ask, what the fuck happened to this low-life piece of shit doctor? What jail is he rotting in? How much of his padded doctor’s accounts have gone to help these people he so very wrongly fucked over for no logical acceptable believable reason? Well, it will be a great relief to know that he cannot practice medicine in the province of Ontario again. That’s it. No fucking charges of giving false evidence or obstruction of justice or perjury or anything else. Nothing. He had destroyed lives, countless lives, vilifying many parents with an accusation worse than death himself. No, sorry, revoking hospital privileges does not even come fucking close to what has to happen to this bastard.