SUNDAY SERMON FROM DILLINGER FLAKEWAITER

Sunday Sermon-Children of the Heavenly Hearth

We speak of children so soft, so sweet, yet full they are of life's retreat. They beckon us as God's fair child did give His life for everyone who submits to His glory. I speak softy to you, my children, of the hearth who wait gently for God. In warm-ed flame, in soft requite you cherish yourselves. This sin to wait in self defile, thinking only that you do His will, is truly no greatness beyond the wild divide of liturgy and lithsome whit. Is it not against His very will to deny the growth within your hearts? So why do you, His children, born to worship without bandied consideration,deny His very existence simply to do so? Fall upon your knees, sweet children, wail to the Lord that you have sinned, not given birth for the sake of His glory, but rather, for your disgusting loinal prurient lusts. I sneer at you for you are His filth, His nasty mistakes that no not love only thrust and pary that rapier of passion.

I stood on high purple mountain throbbing with lust for my Lord. No, you brutal sinners, not yours but His. I have given all to Him who trusts in me to grovel at His feet, to lick between His toes at majestic jam of toe. Oh no, I foreswore the depraved lusts of common man to be able to give to you all His simple blessings yet you refute me, you chastize me, spit upon my purple throbbing majesty! You have no more deep regard for yourselves and less for Him, you disgusting miserable pathetic sinners, for I am blessed with certainty not some hope of peace, prosperity lies. NO NO I scream upon such purple mount that this day is given to me to give to you to let you in to God's great glory.

Be certain in His divine love, fall to your knees oh hear the angel voices, oh night divine when Christ was born. Pull off your chains on this His blessed day, write your future in God's braille so that you all may join me in heavenly bliss and piss on sinners who could not repent to Him.

Now for the last time, give up your mammon host and give to Him that Lord of Love that, as He promised, you may buy his Love. YES YES-buy His love, for dear remorseful children, it can be bought. To regret mammon is great sin; to give it is great love. Come to me, bend to me, give me some good lovin'---damn there I go again just as I was gettin' good. Um-er-where was I? Oh yes. It is true for I have sinned to not take your offer of love to Him. My Chevy burns within my heart, my Godly Maseratti has no fuel-Reverend Dillinger stands to you, falls to his knees-where are you, my children of mammon-OH GOD IN HEAVEN THEY HAVE DEFILLED-DESTROYED-REFUSED TO REFUEL-OH LORD IN HEAVEN FORGIVE ME FOR NOT-FOR NOD IS THE LAND PROMISED TO US BY YOU, OUR GREAT AND GLORIOUS LEADER-HEIL GOD-HEIL GOD-HEIL GOD-now go read your damn bible you fools-it'll tell you exactly what to do-SEND MONEY!!!!

LOVE REVEREND DILLINGER GREAT MASTER OF THE CHURCH OF HEAVENLY LOINAL DIVERSIONS-AND BUSTY BUCKS. OH CHILDREN OF THE HEARTH DO COME!!!!

Say Chuck did you hear his sermon?
No George I just turned on the game?
Fair dues Chuck, got a beer?