SUNDAY SERMON WITH REV DILLINGER FLAKEWAITER

Good morning to you, my children. It is the time of year, isn't it? I hear you say 'what time of year do you mean, dear Reverend Flakewaiter?' What is the question you ask the man of the Lord who wardens the flock of you, the chosen? Why? Well children, it is the time of year because it is, plain and simple. 'What?' you say. I hear you thinking 'what?' The time of year is every second you walk on the planet, God's creation. Stop before you begin to think of an answer. Accept and you shall be saved by the hand of God, or at least shoved along the right pathway. I tell you I held the child in my arms, weary, covered in filth, my skin speckled by its blood, the tongue of the child. 'What?' I hear you say. What? I say to you again in the face of Almight God that I held the child in my arms. What did I think? If I had thought I might indeed have been sent to meet my maker far sooner. Then, then my children, where would you be?

I held the child. They spoke to me. 'Kill it and walk away for surely it will destroy you'. The Lord told me this after I rolled the slime over, held it in my arms, succoured it to the nation of the Lord. 'The damn thing is booby trapped, sure as hell, Dillinger! It'll blow your sorry ass and us all to hell!' This is also what the Lord my God told me after. I did not hear for He made me deaf. I picked up this holy child and brought it to its salvation which was me. Yes, yes the damned medics fixed the slimey little thing up. Patch patch patch, all they did -- them, us, and some of the rest.

Do you listen or are you deaf? Do you pick up the child, succour, hold and love? Do you shoot it in the back of the head, or the front, for it makes no difference? Have you the grace of God in your hearts? Is your soul defiled by fear, the rancor of hatred? Turn to your bretheren, hold them, for they are your children. Give them grace and show no fear, for the ones with fear who stand up and are counted for God hear not. You cannot have courage without fear. Be sore afraid and stand to the beast, grace, grace, grace, be with you as you stand bold, powerful, full of lust for the Lord God Almighty. Hold the child, dear friends, and on the day when you stand before your maker, as you most surely will, you can and will be allowed as blessed cattle to graze in his almighty presence. Do not be afraid of being as you were meant to be. That herd that stands in the fields of the Lord. Come to me, hold me gracefully in your gentle arms and we shall be together in those pastures of Heaven. Amen and blessed Amen.

Contributions can and should be sent to: The Right Reverend and Gracefilled Bishop of the church of latter day deaf mutes-Dillinger Flakewaiter